Tuesday, March 07, 2006

So how long IS it going to take?

One of the things that has supremely frustrated me about the adoption process is the ever-changing timelines. I am a Monica Bing personality and when I want something, I want it now, or I at least want to know the specifics of EXACTLY when I will have it.

With a pregnancy, you pretty much know that give or take 36 weeks after you find out you are pregnant that your child will be born. And, to top it off, you have ultrasounds, baby kicks, doctor's appointments, maternity clothes shopping, and an expanding waistline to take your mind off the wait. Each day presents something exciting, and the wait goes by quickly!

With an adoption, you don't have any of that. There is a lot of activity getting your paperwork together, and then pretty much nothing until the referral. Oh you can work on the nursery, and what not, but you really can't shop as you have no idea what size or age you will be referred. Now, if I knew that I was going to have to wait 6 months for a referral that would be ok. But the timeline keeps changing. At first, when we sent our application in, we were told that referrals were 5-6 months after LID (log in date) in China. Then the wait stretched to 7 months, then to 8, then to 9, and now they are projecting 10-12. Of course, that's not to say that over the course of the next year that the timelines won't drop back down just as quickly, but I can't hope for that or expect that, because all that leads to is disappointment.

Derek and I will definitely make use of the time together- we are going to Alabama for his fishing tournament next week, I've got the marathon thing, and we'll cheer for our Tigers this fall like the crazy fanatics we are, but to have this mysterious wait time hanging out there is enough to drive me batty! I can't plan, I can't shop, and there's nothing to do right now but wait.

I ordered a pattern to make the crib bedding, that will take up a couple of weekends, and I plan to paint the guest bathroom. That will take up all of one weekend. I've painted everything else, the new carpet is in, scrapbooks are in process, books are being read, movies are being watched. What else is there?

Well, I can go to everyone else's blogs and see how they are. The ones with babies home are the best, as it gives me a glimpse of what we have to look forward to. The ones in the same stage of the process as us are comforting- it helps to know I am not the only one suffering from the "I can't wait any longers..."

On that note, I will end this post. If anyone is starting up a secret pal thing for adoption couples in the same time frame as us, I am up for it! Just let me know... will give me an excuse to go shopping.....

1 comment:

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